McSWEENEY'S INTERNET TENDENCY'S PATREON
Join our Patreon for as little as $5 a month and get access to author interviews, content calls, discounts at our store, and more. Help support our writers and keep our site ad-free.
Short Imagined Monologues
Send your short imagined monologues to websubmissions@mcsweeneys.net.
-
October 23, 2007In the Early ’70s, a Chicago Native Approves of the Sears Tower Construction, in Anticipation of It Beating the World Trade Center for Tallest Building in the World
-
October 9, 2007After Organizing an Emergency Eight-and-Three-Fourths-Year Reunion, a Late Bloomer Shares Some Important News With Her Class
-
October 2, 2007An Obsessive-Compulsive’s Prayer Before Death
-
September 26, 2007The CEO of the Olive Garden Makes His Last Stand on the “Free Breadsticks” Issue
-
September 17, 2007Upon Hearing Fred’s Usual Suggestion That the Gang Split Up, Velma Raises a Few Issues
-
September 5, 2007Having Just Completed a Three-Week Throw-Intensive Judo Course, I Strongly Advise You Not to Fuck With Me
-
August 23, 2007Moby-Dick Explains His New Captain Ahab Piercing to His Wife
-
August 14, 2007Narcissus Places a Personal Ad
-
August 8, 2007Death-Metal Star Rethinks Romantic Love Onstage
-
July 31, 2007A Billet-Doux From Your Goldfish
-
July 24, 2007I’m So Happy, I Think I’ll Flip a Car
-
July 20, 2007Eulogy for a Bearded Bee Guy